Date #33: The Elephant in the Room

I'd like to think I'm the type of person who doesn't put too much stock in politics.

Not that I don't think politics is important, but I just wouldn't want to be one of those people who completely dismisses someone because of their political affiliation.

Then I meet someone like Dwight.

Dwight would probably qualify for the "Biggest Disappointment" Award--at least for this month.

We met at a get-together I attended and hit it off almost immediately. He's smart in a quick kind of way, talks like an Aaron Sorkin character, and tends to follow up every quip with a modest smile to let you know he doesn't take himself too seriously.

Our date took place at the horrifically named Papa Razzi. I love the food and atmosphere there; I just wish they'd change the name to something else--maybe something so Italian I wouldn't know what it means.

The good thing about elections coming up is that there's always an easy go-to convo topic if you need one. Dwight and I were getting along fine, but I thought I'd open up the floor to the issue of politics anyway just to see what he'd say.

DWIGHT: To be honest with you, I'm really disillusioned as a Rhode Island voter.
ME: Oh, I understand. Corruption, nepotism--
DWIGHT: I was referring more to the fact that being a Republican in Rhode Island is like being a sphere.
ME: A sphere?
DWIGHT: Pointless. Sorry, I have a degree in Mathematics. They teach us stupid jokes like that as a...well, as a pointless attempt at integrating us into society.
ME: Wait, back up a sec, are you a Republican?
DWIGHT: Sure am.

Now, I've encountered gay Republicans before--Log Cabin, anyone?

In terms of how I feel about it, I usually side with Paula Poundstone's interpretation:

"Gay Republicans. We disapprove of our own lifestyle!"

But again, I'd like to think I'm accepting of other people's politics.

ME: That's cool. I've dated a few guys who were more on the conservative side.
DWIGHT: Well, I mean, there's being a conservative and then being proud enough to say what you are. I hold strong ties to the Republican party.
ME: Is this when you tell me your last name is Hatch?
DWIGHT: I'm afraid my family's roots aren't that illustrious.
ME: By 'illustrious,' do you mean 'cuckoo for cocoa puffs?'
DWIGHT: Maybe we shouldn't get into this too much. Politics on a first date can be a killer.

Spoken like a true GOP p***y.

Just kidding.

The truth is that sometimes I think I get into politics merely because I like having something else to argue about. My major distaste for Republicans obviously comes from the fact that I'm a gay man from Rhode Island who's only mildly religious. I think moreso I always found Republicans to be more hypocritical than Democrats, although I'm sure there's a good deal of hypocrisy in both parties.

Something about trying to get prayer back into schools and then giving the death penalty for people who do everything from smoke marijuana to jaywalk just struck a chord in me.

ME: You're right. We should just avoid the topic altogether.

Of course, now we were going to really hit it off. Every other issue we covered we were in agreement on--

Careers, Family, Billy Joel...

So that by the time dinner was over, the only thing we clashed on was lingering on in our thoughts like that bad Mathematical joke.

We walked around a little bit--it's just starting to get cold, but the shivers tend to look cute when done in the right way.

ME: So...abortion?
DWIGHT: Against it.
ME: Tax cuts for the wealthy?
DWIGHT: For it.
ME: Gathering up all the minorities and mass murdering them?
DWIGHT: Now, when you say 'minorities'...
ME: Whoa.
DWIGHT: Hey, you want to be toss a quip at me, I can toss it right back at you.
ME: Can I just ask what the attraction is in being attached to a political party that clearly does not want you there?
DWIGHT: You really think those few Democrats from the South want you in their party?
ME: Maybe not. But at least they vote in my favor most of the time.

At this point, we had reached Dwight's car. He smiled at me, and then looked up, as if searching for the right words to make me understand why he feels the way he feels.

He settled on this.

DWIGHT: I guess it all stems from me hating people who need to be P.C. I like people who speak their mind even when it's not the popular thing to say, and I don't like people who pretend that the best thing for this country would be for everybody to be equal, because I disagree with that in every way. Not everybody is equal. You and I are smarter than a lot of people, and why should we be ashamed of that? And why shouldn't we be offered more opportunities because of that? Why as a country are we always trying to catch all the weak links up to the strong ones? Everywhere you go someone wants to make you feel bad about who you are--whether you're gay, white, privileged, whatever. I'm sorry, but I refuse to feel guilty for having a little bit of luck thrown my way, and I don't think anyone in this country is going to get anywhere by trying to create more of that luck and spread it around.

With this, he gave me a hug and said "Good-bye."

And that was that.

ME: Could you ever date someone who had completely different political beliefs than you?
FRIEND: Easy question. I have no political beliefs.
ME: You must have some.
FRIEND: I believe in good alcohol, great sex, and musical theater.
ME: Oh, so you're a Libertarian.
FRIEND: Am I?
ME: No, I just needed some kind of response.
FRIEND: Does it really bother you that much that the guy is a Lego Republican?
ME: Lego? You mean, Log Cabin?
FRIEND: Why do they call it Log Cabin?
ME: Maybe it has something to do with Abraham Lincoln being gay.
FRIEND: So why don't they call it the Abe Lincoln Gays?
ME: I don't know. Maybe because having to hear an anchor on CNN say "Today on Capitol Hilll, the Abe Lincoln Gays were out in full force..."

Dwight called asking for another date, and I said "Um...okay."

The truth is, I liked the spark I felt when I found out there was something about him I didn't like.

Does that make any kind of sense?

Just so often nowadays, you go on "Blah" Dates. They're not bad dates, they're not great dates. They're just "Blah." You talk about each other's pasts, goals for the future, and it's all just "Blah, blah, blah."

The thought of having something to actually converse with someone about was kind of thrilling.

I guess I should make some sort of joke about being a bi-partisan, but I'll save that for a future entry.